In case you missed it last Thursday, here’s the recap of my #MediaChat on Forming Great Relationships from March 16, 2017. I’ve expanded on a few thoughts, because we all know there’s only so much you can say in 140 characters. I want to thank Aaron Kilby at Media Chat for having me in the chat. I’m honored and blessed. If you’re so inclined, please join us on Thursdays at 10PM ET for media insights from the world’s top experts.
On with the show, no? *sidenote* I tried to embed others’ tweets, and it went horribly wrong. You can see their responses when you click on my tweets.
What type of relationships are we talking about (business, personal, romantic, etc.)?
All relationships are important, and deserve time and attention. You never know who you’re going to need to know at any given time in your life. Everyone is important in some way, even the people you don’t like or “click” with.
Why should we build relationships? / Why is human connection so important?
It’s scientifically proven that we NEED each other to survive. Disconnection and isolation creates and/or exacerbates depression, loneliness, hopelessness, and suicidal thoughts and actions. Not being able to connect with other humans is very bad for your brain and body.
When should we build relationships?
We’re always building relationships, whether we realize it or not. Everything we do and say affects how we connect with others. If you’re actively trying to build relationships, I suggest you build them before you need them, but not because you’ll need them someday. Ask yourself what you have to offer, and be willing to just give without getting.
How do we build relationships?
With kindness, empathy, love, and respect. You have to give to get. As a side note, respect isn’t earned but lack of respect is. The same with trust, love, and empathy. People generally have it backward, and spend an awful lot of time withholding, instead of giving without expectation of giving. I love because it makes me feel good, not because someone might love me back. Tit-for-tat is a dead-end street, and will take you nowhere.
Should we meet contacts IRL first, online?
It really depends on what you’re comfortable with. There are many people with social anxiety, and sometimes it’s so severe that the thought of walking out the door to meet people is debilitating. That’s okay. It’s perfectly fine to create and maintain online-only relationships. At some point, though, the physical loneliness will take its toll, as explained above.
What are the advantages of meeting people online first?
Having an open dialogue. Saying exactly what you mean becomes important, because you can’t infer tone, only attribute it – and that’s based not only on context, but your mood and what you’re receptive to at the time. If you’re angry, someone’s comments may seem inflammatory. However, if you’ve actually talked to someone, and know their communication style, you can often “hear” them when they type something.
What are the advantages of meeting people in person first?
The biggest advantages are being able to see body language and take social cues. This can happen online, but it’s much more difficult.
How do we maintain connection?
You just do. Call, write, text, tweet, or otherwise reach out. don’t wait for them. We’re all busy, and we’re not always thinking of others first. If you haven’t heard from someone, open a hailing frequency. They may be grateful you did.
What should we do when relationships get messy?
Step back, breathe, think and write it out. Try to see things from someone else’s side, and understand. You don’t have to agree, but understanding will go a long way toward building a strong relationship, even with your “enemies”.
How should we handle relationships with our competitors, or people who oppose us?
Smile, send them love, and do lunch. You don’t have to be liked by everyone. In fact, I can guarantee you won’t be liked by everyone. That’s okay. We’re not all hardwired to enjoy one another, only to connect. If you try to connect, though, you might find out that you have things in common, and that’s basically the singularity of any relationship.
A10 Communicate. Do lunch. Dialogue helps people see each other as human. pic.twitter.com/Qy0Y3zdkMm— Terra Walker | Let’s Eat! (@terra_walker) March 17, 2017
I hope you enjoyed this little catch-up session. Don’t forget to join in #MediaChat on Thursdays at 10PM ET.